Included in those "several days" are my former wedding anniversary, Christmas Eve, and Christmas. My parents always say, "it's just a day." I agree. MY Christmas is when Cami is home. However, knowing the rest of the Christians in the world are celebrating on Dec. 25 is a bit difficult. I can do it; I've done it for 10 years. Which brings me to the next point. I'm READY for a relationship. An adult relationship with a man. Yes. You heard me. I've done Match, Perfectmatch, eharmony, blind dates, set ups with friends of friends, blind dates... so what is the problem? Perhaps I wasn't as "ready" as I thought I was? Perhaps I haven't found the right person? No idea. But, I'm SURE NOW is the time. Okay? Help a girl out! :-)
Friday, December 16, 2011
Tonight was a bit tough. I had another version of the stomach bug beginning yesterday and had to miss work today. Cami left this afternoon for 10 days with her dad. On the positive, I have several days to connect with friends, buy and wrap presents, and take time for myself.
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Thank you, God. Thank you for blessing me with my amazing little girl. Thank you for choosing me to be her mother. I didn't realize I would need to discuss death, or relationships (family, BOYS, and girlfriends) so often. However, today I realized that these experiences help her understand life, the importance of relationships, death and You.
We had a tragic, terrible experience this morning. We tried to save a little white dog trotting down a road full of traffic. We attempted to happily lure her into the car, in the dark. The dog didn't respond, and headed right into the intersection of a major highway, only to be hit (as I heard, and my daughter saw) by a "monster truck." Do you know what my angel said? Through her tears, she put her hands in a "why" gesture and said, "God always has a purpose." Really?! I wasn't even "there" yet in my own head, and my 9 year old recognized that? In fact, I was pissed. I was thinking, "WHY did you let my daughter see this? WHY?" I'm seriously amazed by her. From the time she was 3 and recognized my grief at the loss of my father, to now. Talk about intuitive. I've never been so proud of anything in my life.
The experience this morning and the fact that she can describe the scene in detail disturb me. However at the end of the day, she donated $45 of her own money to an animal shelter "in memory of the dog that died today." Thank you for reminding me of my blessings. I'm sorry it took this tragic event to remember.
Monday, September 19, 2011
Normalcy (according to Websters):
Definition of NORMALCY
- Let's hope for an end to the war and a return to normalcy.
- normalcy of peacetime life>
My question is this: "what is the state...of being normal?" What is the operational definition? What in the hell is "normal?" My normal and your normal are probably different. My normal is a quiet home with my daughter. On a week night we do homework, have dinner, shower, and then watch tv or play outside IF there is time. Then it is read and go to bed. Weekend...our normal is to totally chill out on Friday nights. We are both too exhausted to formulate a thought. Saturday and Sunday are typically soccer games, groceries, errands, play dates, movies, etc.
I WANT my "normal' to be all of the above without the added stresses of work, or mood swings (we are both female after all), pressures, being pulled multiple directions, cleaning house, doing laundry, etc. Okay, I want to have my cake and eat it too. I'm sick of that cliche. But I guess that sums up my wants. While I'm on that subject however, I must say that I also want a companion. I want to share my life with another adult, preferably a cute, intelligent male. I think I wanted another child (given I have the aforementioned male companion.) I'd love a bigger home, more organization, more time to devote to my child and more time to effectively do my job. Perhaps being on only 1 campus would help? Maybe it wouldn't. Really, I want to have an effect on children and teachers. I want to demonstrate and model the best practices of educating and parenting. I need to seek that opportunity, as well as the other opportunities I mentioned. I want to be thin without stretch marks. Now...let me get back to my reality... :-) We all have dreams.
Monday, July 4, 2011
Initially I thought, "she's just having her tonsils out." Now we are on day 5 and she is still in pain. I don't like it one bit. She woke up in the middle of the night with intense ear pain, and it is still here as I type. She did overcome vomiting on day 2 which was horrible. Each day is better, so I'm thankful for that.
Today is the 4th of July. I hope we are able to get out of the house at some point.